Mediation...
Philosophy/Benefits of Mediation.
Benefits of Mediation over litigation: - less costly, less time consuming, each party contributes to shape their own outcome - the outcome is not imposed by a third party (judge/jury).
Problems are inherent in human nature. We each have our own ideas and thoughts on a subject and there are times when the person (company) we are dealing with is not on the same wavelength. Courts were set up to help people settle their disputes without resorting to violence. Somewhere along the way people forgot how to settle their disputes without going to court. Thus, the Court System became an entanglement to which only those privileged few (lawyers) knew how to weave through the process.
Thus, the average citizen became lost in this forest of bureaucracy - unable to understand the process. Furthermore, to add fuel to the fire the average citizen has no idea if the legal counsel they hired is doing everything possible. How would you know? You do not belong to the "club" with the no how - you can only hope that the person you hired won't make matters worse.
Today, there is a backlog in the court systems - highest priority given to those that have their freedom on the line -, which is the correct order. Thus, custody, contract and smaller disputes have given rise to a year or more waiting period in most jurisdictions.
The cost is another factor that has become prohibitive for many citizens. Custody cases and contract disputes can run up tens of thousands of dollars in a court of law before any settlement is determined.
Conflict can be turned into positive energy when it is directed properly. There is an old saying that you are only given what you can handle and what does not kill you makes you stronger. That is true with conflict. The person that can handle the situation in a mature fashion has a better chance of rising above the dispute and gaining something positive from the experience.
Thus, Mediation gives both parties an outlet to design an outcome that will benefit all concerned. It will be a solution that will not be imposed by a third party that really has no interest in the dispute.
Benefits of Mediation over litigation: - less costly, less time consuming, each party contributes to shape their own outcome - the outcome is not imposed by a third party (judge/jury).
The Mediation Process - Steps:
- After both parties have decided to enlist the mediation help of Mediate Not Litigate a Mediation Date/Time will be set-up.
- A package will be sent out to each party containing: Inquiry/Intake Form (who the parties are, who can sign agreement and short caption of the conflict), Rules and Mediation Agreement (agreement between Mediator and Client). Complete and send back or bring with you to the mediation.
- Mediator will send out letter or e-mail to parties confirming date/time session.
- Pre-Mediation conference call: approximately 10 minutes. Briefly go over the rules, mediation agreement and fee/payment. Discuss what information/documentation will be exchanged at the meeting and answer questions about the process. Pre-Mediation conference call about 1-5 days prior to meeting.
- Day of Mediation: Parties come together to discuss solutions.
- After an agreement is reached parties will sign-off on a rough draft. A final copy will be drafted by one of the parties and sent to each party for final signature.
- The Mediator shall follow-up with the parties after the mediation to ensure that the agreement reached during mediation contained everything discussed and is signed by both parties.
- If no agreement is reached during the time frame - parties will have the choice of setting up an additional meeting or continuing on to court.
- All documentation accumulated by the Mediator will be shredded after both parties sign final settlement agreement and mediation services are no longer needed.
Sage:
Sage has been used most notably as a purifying agent in American Indian cultures. Much like Frankincense has been used in the Catholic Church. The leaves are burned and the smoke is passed around the individual in a serene outdoor setting.
We use sage during our initial meeting with opposite parties to remind us that life is not only about the immediate problem at hand. There is more to life. The introduction of sage is a reminder to be one with nature and not to loose our way. Too many times in conflict situations we forget that each party is a human being, capable of love and sorrow. We all have families and other avenues of our lives that need to be nurtured - we must not forget.
Thus, we use sage to remind us that we are all one with nature - to use the time to think about what we really want out of this mediation - we ask the spirit (whatever religion/faith the person belongs) to guide us in this meeting and to help clarify and ground our thoughts.
If parties are adverse to this process, it can be omitted.
Rules:
Come Prepared - think of what you want to get out of this session - what will bring peace to your mind/heart/soul. This is your first step toward acknowledging a willingness to settle out of court. This mediation session will probably be a unique/different experience for many of you. We will begin by first cleansing our mind/spirit - which involves a brief outdoor encounter with nature using sage as a purifying agent to help us focus.
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